Archive for July, 2004

False Paternity…

Wednesday, July 14th, 2004

I came across this article today that describes a loop-hole in the California Justice system when it comes to child support. Innocent men are paying the price for children that are not their own. Some father’s don’t even know they have children until their wages are garnished. To me it is worth a read.

Today Tillie and I get to bond. How so? I have to get a urine sample from her. I can see the look on her face now as she goes to squat and I try to stick some Tupperware under her rump. It will more or less be the, “Mom are you crazy?” look. Should be fun….NOT.

Tillie has woken me up every night for the past three nights to go pee. And when we are walking the frequency of her urinations has increased, but not every time is she able to excrete any bodily fluids. So I called the vet today so that we can go in and see what is going on. Every night I have been able to get her to go outside when she decides she wants to go at 3 AM, but last night there was a thunderstorm, and as soon as I opened the door there was a loud clap and she walked backwards away from the door and gave me the you’ve-gotta-be-kidding-me look. I ended up having to take her out front in my Pocahantus PJs. My neighbor’s probably had quite a show with my wardrobe choices from yesterday. I started out in my work clothes, then changed to my more-fun-than-a-dead-hooker t-shirt and finished the day off in my Disney cartoon nightgown.

Emotional Exageration

Tuesday, July 13th, 2004

Ok, I have gotten some questions about the poems I wrote, so I am going to go ahead and address them. When I am feeling particularly confused or emotional I try to use my poetry to explore my feelings. Sometimes if I don’t have enough of a particular emotion to completely understand it I will take and exagerate it in a poem to help me explore what it is exactly that I am experiencing.

I am not writhing in pain as many seem to have interpreted these last two poems. I just explored some feelings that I knew were there and wanted to better understand. Thanks for the concern, but I will be ok. Promise!

My Green Thumb

Wednesday, July 7th, 2004

So I think I have a green thumb. Either that or I am psycho. Really though, I can see a difference already in the size of my flowers out front. I am just going to keep watering them and see what happens. My fern on the other hand is looking gorgeous. It is all perky now and no longer drooping towards the floor. If I can just have the same amount of luck with the grass I am attempting to grow in the back yard.

Wish me luck! :satisfied:

Knew Better

Tuesday, July 6th, 2004

Promises broken,
to myself and those I love.
Looking back,
to a past better left behind.
Playing with fire,
knowing I would only be burned.
Inward longing,
for that total happiness to return.
Acting the part,
I knew better than to audition for.


Tuesday, July 6th, 2004

The last pettle falls,
the verdict is in,
he loves me not.

Sugar coated words,
were nothing but,
shadows from the past.

I’m left holding the key,
trying to relock the door,
that holds back history.